Dot Com Crash!
You’ve Never Seen Anything Like It!
Wow!
It seemed like everyone in Silicon Valley was calling me looking for a job. It was unbelievable. A stream of what seemed like never-ending resumes emailed in, then a follow up voicemail. They all sort of said the same thing: “Joe, I sent you my resume and I’m calling to see if you got it, and to see if you have anything for me.”
Mike Jones was a CFO looking for a job. His message was different. He sent me his resume and called to follow up. We had a good chat and he left me this voice mail message a week or so later: “Hi Joe, it’s me, Mike Jones. I heard about a good Controller job that sounds pretty interesting. As you know, Joe, in spite of the tight job market, I have my heart set on a CFO role. I thought this job might possibly be a match for someone you might know who is looking for a Controller job. I just wanted to call and tell you about it because I know you must be getting tons of resumes and phone calls about now, from guys looking for jobs. If you want, give me a call back when you get a chance and I’ll tell you about it.” I thought this was a very good networking call.
Peter Lefkowitz says, “When everyone else Zigs, you gotta Zag.”
Mike was tuned into everyone favorite radio station WIIFM. WII-FM is: What’s In It for Me. I can’t tell you how many times people call and say something like this on voicemail: I sent you MY resume and I wanted to call you to see if you got it and if you might have anything for ME.
Mind you, I think this call is better than not calling, but so weak compared to the call above, don’t you agree?
When networking, always remember WII-FM. Remember to use MOPFI and remember the Rules of Influence. MOPFI was taught to us by Dale Carnegie. It stands for: Make Other People Feel Important. Honest flattery will get you everywhere. Be a finder of good in people and tell them what you like about them, and they will like you. Some might call you a schmoozer but its better to be accused of being a Rich Schmoozer than to be Broke & Proper.
I’m not talking about making things up. I’m talking about adopting a habit of looking for the good in your fellow man and when you find it, for God’s sake don’t be bashful, tell him or her about it! !! !! !!! This will make you a builder of men.
Trust me, this is very powerful, plus it’s so simple. You would think everyone is doing it, but they are not. I can prove it. When was the last time you lay in bed, thinking about your day, and thought to yourself, “I wish Jimmy had not paid me that nice, honest, sincere compliment earlier today. I get so tired with people finding the good in me and then complimenting me about it all the time.”
It’s been a while, hasn’t it? Let people think what they will. Be a good finder and DO NOT HOLD BACK! This is your new favorite line: “You know what I like about you and USE THEIR NAME. Dale Carnegie said that a person’s name is music to their ears. Use that line verbatim or make up your own but begin finding the good in your fellow man and share your findings! Stealth is wasted wealth when it comes to finding the good in your fellow man.
The same simple approach applies with a liberal application of gratitude. When was the last time you went to bed thinking this: “I wish Lucy hadn’t given me that sincere heartfelt thank you today.” Develop an “Attitude of Gratitude” as Zig Ziglar calls it. The Bible says if you are grateful you get more. Practicing gratitude and expressing honest appreciation are two of the biggest keys to successful networking.
Seems simple, doesn’t it? Why doesn’t everyone do it? Jim Rohn says, “We don’t know.. .some do and some don’t, some will and some won’t.” He calls it “Mysteries of the mind.” Jim says the difference between success and failure is “A few simple disciplines practiced daily.”
When networking, always remember the rules of influence:
- People want what they can’t have.
- If there aren’t many left, people want it.
- People want what other people want.
- People want to keep up with the Joneses.
- The Law of Reciprocity, which says that if I do something nice for you, you now want to do something nice for me.
- No one wants that which another person is trying to give away for free.
It’s important to remember these rules when selling. Oh wait, you didn’t buy a book on selling, you bought one on networking, you say. Well, how about selling you to the association president?
Or:
Selling your way into an organization
Selling your way onto the organizations board
Selling someone one on hiring you
Selling your boss on a big raise
Selling your kids on eating their vegetables
Selling someone on going out on a date with you
Selling yours truly, on being more aggressive
Selling your nephew on going to college
Selling your idea to your employees
Whether you are a “salesperson” or not, you are always “selling,” especially when you are networking!
I remember a friend looking for a job at one point said to me, “Joe, I’m just plain not any good at selling myself.” I told him, “If you’re not willing to work on your ability to sell, let’s just work on your patience.” Will that help, he asked? “No, but you’ll be looking for a job for a long time!
“Look,” I told him, “what would be sadder than a brilliant engineer here in Silicon Valley who invented a computer chip 10 times faster than anything on the market today, but without the selling and presentation skills to sell the idea? It would be a useless invention, wouldn’t it?”
He saw my point and read a few books on selling. I think a lot of people, especially accounting/finance, engineering, computer and technical types block their own progress because they tell themselves they are not good at sales. Be aware of what you are saying to yourself, if it is something disempowering like, “I’m not a good networker,” change it to, “I’m becoming better at networking,” or something more empowering. After all, you are reading a book on the subject, which is more than most people do.
Do you believe in affirmations? That’s where you say to yourself something over and over again until it becomes you. You might say “I weigh 175 pounds” over and over again until it becomes you. Studies have shown we have about 60,000 thoughts a day and many of them are the same thoughts repeated. Someone once said, “One of the most rare things is indeed an original thought.”
Perhaps you are due for an injection of new thoughts. Write down ten things on index cards that you want to be or change about yourself. Write them in the first person, present tense, as if they were already true. For example:
I’m a power networker.
I am a good-finder.. I look for the good in everyone I meet.
I’m terrific at remembering names.
I love to tell people what I like about them.
I love to read.
I’m a center of influence person.
I love to take chances.
I love to introduce myself to new people.
I always seem to meet the right people at the right time in all the right places.
I live life with maximum enthusiasm!
Read these cards aloud to yourself a few times each day and before you retire at night. Keep them in your coat pocket or in your purse. In time you will find some of them become you, you won’t need these cards anymore, and you can then add new ones. This is a do it-to-yourself project. Don’t tell people you are doing this; they will discourage you or think you are strange. Don’t worry, my friend, when you are broke, they call you strange. But when you are rich, they call you eccentric! Besides, it’s better to be Strange & Rich than Broke & Normal!
My brother John says I could sell ice to Eskimos. After taking that speed-reading class, early in my career I read every book on selling I could get my hands on. I also set a goal for myself to read 52 books in one year. “A book a week,” that’s all I asked. I have to tell you about December of that year I was a young man looking for some pretty skinny books! O But, I made my goal. Readers are leaders and the rest work for them.
The best book I ever read was a book called Think and Grow Rich by Napoleon Hill. Before I read that book I was gaining in confidence and finding myself, improving daily. You know, measured progress? I am telling you that after I read that book, I realized that I could do anything in life I set my mind to. It was powerful.. .a Knowing. I don’t know if the book will have the same effect on you but it has had that effect on many of the millions who have read it.
Napoleon Hill went to interview Andrew Carnegie in what was supposed to be a one hour interview. The interview lasted a day and a half! To make a long story short, Napoleon accepted the challenge of Andrew Carnegie to study the world’s most successful people. Mr. Carnegie would provide the introductions and Napoleon would write about the common denominators that existed in successful individuals following his interview. Whom did he interview? People like Henry Ford, William Wrigley Jr., Charles Schwab, Wilbur Wright, George Eastman,
Woodrow Wilson, John Rockefeller, Thomas Edison, and Alexander Graham Bell. Napoleon distilled brilliantly in plain English their success theories and said this:
“What is education, anyway? This has been answered in full detail.
Somewhere, as you read, the secret to which I refer will jump from the page and stand boldly before you if you are ready for it! When it appears, you will recognize it. To me one of the secrets was: “Whatever the mind of man can conceive and believe it can achieve.” Let me not reveal the rest of the book’s secrets but let me state clearly the regard with which I hold the potential of this book, to magnify your networking greatness.
Networking magic takes enthusiasm. Selling has been defined as transference of enthusiasm. The word, enthusiasm comes from the Greek word entheos meaning, the God within. If you operate with maximum enthusiasm, people will forgive you for your faults. Try it. When you bring your maximum enthusiasm to a networking event you are like a supernatural magnet attracting to you the good things and the people you need to meet.
By the same token, be aware that like attracts like. If you are not feeling 100% sometimes the best thing you can do is go straight home after work and go to bed. Proper sleep plays a big role in successful networking. Believe me I learned this lesson the hard way. Early in my career I loved to party, but quickly found out that partying and success don’t mix. Better to be rich and sober than hung-over and broke, that’s for sure! !! O I used to try and get as drunk as I possibly could on Fridays. That way the urge to drink didn’t return ’till the following Friday! “Learn your limits,” Ben Franklin said, “moderation in all things.”
Enthusiasm doesn’t always mean jumping up and down, shouting or being boisterous. Sometimes it’s the lift in your walk. It’s the erectness of your carriage. It’s the look in your eye, the warmth of your smile, your handshake. It is your God within. I don’t know how to better describe it. Just get quiet, feel it and then let it shine out from within you.
Chapter Three Self-Confidence
Your self-confidence level will play an important role in your ability to network. I believe each of us is given at birth a giant-sized reservoir of self-confidence. We then learn through conscious or unconscious effort to tap into our full potential. We learn how to tap in at different points in our lives. Once we begin to uncover things that lead to our higher levels of self-confidence, we can become very excited about our unique abilities.
Our self-confidence is never at a set level. Rather, it is ever changing. Sometimes we might feel unstoppable and other times Mr. Doubt weasels his way in, but that’s okay. It’s natural to have doubts no matter who you are.
Our self-confidence can help us hold on to our dreams, but a lack of self-confidence can hold you back something fierce. After all, how can you tend to the garden of your dreams in life if you are always wondering, “Am I a man, or a mouse?”
If we realize that we are constantly discovering and growing into our vast reservoir of self-confidence, then it becomes incumbent upon us to seek out new ways to grow faster rather than accidentally reaching new levels all the time.
When I was in the 3rd grade, Mrs. Westover arranged her class with one desk right next to hers. Each week she rotated the students so that each kid sat next to her for one week during the year. When it was my week to sit next to Mrs. Westover she mentioned to me that my name had come up in the teacher’s lounge. She said they were talking about how smart I was and how much potential I had.
Now I don’t really know if Mrs. Westover found a way to pay that same compliment to every kid during his or her week. I hope she did!! But what I do know is I learned one of my first lessons in growing my self-confidence through unconscious effort.
You’re reading an excerpt of a leading Executive Recruiter’s book, Work Your Network! By Joe Pelayo.
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Executive Recruiters Book, Work Your Network! Part 6
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30-Year Executive Recruiter Joe Pelayo from Joseph Michaels International Recruiters has been filling jobs for client companies in the United States and around the World since 1990.