Well, I hope you enjoyed Barry’s letter. I know I did, but more than entertain you I wanted to make this point. When Barry told me Vic was too aggressive, that was one of only a very few times, in my nearly 20 years in the recruiting business that someone was ruled out for being TOO aggressive. So you see, you almost can’t be too aggressive, especially in your networking.
So now you’re out there, you’re inviting yourself to meetings and then inviting yourself on to the board and meeting lots of people. You’re showing up. Now what do you do? Networking to me is actively looking for opportunities to help people advance in their careers and grow in their lives. Now, when you need a hand, LOTS of people want to help you. Zig Ziglar says it like this:
“You can have anything in life you want, if you’ll just help enough other people get what they want.”
Keep track of everyone you meet in a computerized rolodex, otherwise known as a contact manager such as Outlook, Act, Salesforce.com, Saleslogix, Goldmine, etc. The more personal information you can get in it, the more powerful it becomes, the better it will serve you. For example, we collect the following personal information in addition to the normal address, phone and email: Hobbies, birthday, career goals, spouse and kid’s names and ages, alumni, associations, favorite vacation spot, favorite restaurant, favorite movie, etc. It might take several meetings or phone calls to collect all this information and we sort of collect it as we go.
You can’t just walk up to someone and say, “I’d like to add you to my network, would you kindly fill out my form?” But when a guy tells you he’s taking his 8-year-old golfing this weekend and that he is on his third set of clubs, (the 8year-old!), you CAN write it down OR type it into the computer right then, while you’re talking to the guy, like I did. I wear a headset, I smile, I dial and I bang the keyboard. People are so impressed with my great “memory.” I’m like an elephant, they say. I never forget. Why? Because my computer never forgets, that’s why. I do have a great memory but the computer is so much better.
In addition to a Contact Manager, you’ll need a calendar. I have to tell you the first year I used a calendar religiously was in 1989 when I tripled my income and earned over $100,000.00. American Express had sent me a free, hardcover calendar and I started out with that. Now I use a Samsung Phone/Palm calendar thing with email and wireless web access. Ahhh, technology.. .1 love it!
The other tool you will need is a good wardrobe. My beautiful wife Vanessa works at Nordstrom, so she gets a nice employee discount. Because I married her, I get the same discount. Sometimes I joke, “Momma didn’t have no stupid children.” O
Well, you don’t have to build your wardrobe at Nordstrom. (As you know, I started with one of my first suits from Goodwill!) You can find good clothes at lower cost stores but if you can afford it, you have a less chance of buying the wrong clothes at the better stores.
For more on what to wear, get John T. Malloy’s great book, Dress for Success. This book is not a fashion guide or something out of Hollywood, but rather a study of how people respond to the clothes people wear. Malloy sent a man into offices with the same script, thousands of times and basically tracked how many times he got to see the general manager without an appointment. Then he changed the suit, then the tie, then the shirt, thousands of times.
He then took pictures of men to the streets of New York and asked people: Which of these men do you think is the most successful? Which do you trust? He asked which one do you find sexually attractive? Which one looks like the one you would be most likely to hire in a job interview? Etc., etc., etc. Thousands of times! Reading Dress for Success or Dress for Success for Women is one of the best things you can do as you move towards your power networking future.
Now I joked earlier about Miss Manners but I will tell you that I took a class from Syndi Seid, President and founder of Advanced Etiquette here in San Francisco, to clean up my act so I would know what fork to use. I learned all kinds of niceties, like did you know, when you introduce two people you are supposed to introduce the lesser important person to the more important person? The way you remember that one is, you always present TO the King or Queen. Also when you give your business card to someone properly you are to present it with the writing facing towards them.
Brian Tracy says, “Everything counts.”
So now you’re out there, you’re looking good, you’re acting like a lady or a gentleman, meeting all the right people. Now, what’s the best way to Work Your Network?
Let me give you some examples of networking, good and bad. The names have been changed to protect the innocent (or the guilty). But first, let me tell you the most creative networking story that you will ever hear.
A number of years ago, I went to see a potential client in
Silicon Valley. The man I went to see looked younger than I had expected he would. He had sounded so much older on the phone. He was the VP of Finance and the #2 finance guy in a company that had gone from zero to a billion in sales in record time. Somehow I assumed he’d be at least 40 or 50. Turns out he was 28, or so he said.
I remember being surprised at how young he looked. His phone presence had seemed so much older. He’d had 8 promotions in 7 years. I asked him how he had risen so high up the corporate ladder in such a very short time and this is what he told me.
“Well, you see, Joe, what I did was, first I mastered my job, and then I mastered my boss’ job. Then I got to know a great headhunter and I told the headhunter how great my boss was.
“The headhunter recruited my boss and then, well, as you know, the company likes to promote from within around here and… ” he trailed off and then I smiled in disbelief, then he winked and said to me, “By the way, Joe, have you met our Chief Financial Officer?”
The guy left the firm very shortly thereafter and I lost touch with him. I was so nervous in the meeting because it represented such a large piece of new business and because I had just met this guy, I never got the chance to ask if he was pulling my leg or not. Even if he had been, you’d still have to give him an “A” in creative thinking just to think of that. “More than one way to use a headhunter,” he said.
Another time, I had a woman who was pending on a job. It was a CFO position, over about 150 people, in a very large company. In talking to her after the interview she told me “Joe, if you get me that job, everyone I hire will come from Joseph Michaels, Inc., (the name of my company).” I thought that was a bit manipulative but pretty creative.
Here’s a bad networking example. I called this guy at an unnamed company recently. I don’t want to name names so we’ll just call him “George B. Slow” for the sake of having a name to call him.
I had heard that George was hiring. I found out about his opening from a person who had interviewed with George twice, but had now taken another job. That person had suggested that if I had someone, of a similar background, I might want to call George and introduce myself. I did, so.. .1 did.
George told me, as quickly as I could tell him why I was calling, that he’d had hired someone. I asked him what company the person he had hired came from… “You see George, the person that you hired, might be leaving a job that might be a match for this other person that I have. Maybe we can help this other person get a job, too.” But, before I could finish he hung up on me.
In the old days I would have called him back to get even with him… “Sorry George, they are working on the phone lines over here and I guess they cut us off.. .0h. . . you did huh? Then this will make us about EVEN, WON’T IT?” SLAM! ! ! ! ! !! ! !!! But the new enlightened me just sighed and thought, “What a shame. ” Not just because he had missed an opportunity to have a lively conversation with a brilliant, well-connected headhunter, (Modest, too, huh?), with nearly 20 years of experience. He didn’t even take enough time to get my phone number or anything. He didn’t know who I was. Furthermore, he was so rude. There’s just no excuse for being rude.
The old me might have called his boss back and said, “Yes, hello, Bob here from Robert-and-a-Quarter. I was just calling to check a reference on George B. Slow who said he used to work for you. What’s that, he works for you now??? Oh sorry, ahhh, please disregard this phone call. ” Click. Oh come on, don’t hate me. I’m only joking. You don’t think I would really do that, do you? You fight fire with water, not with more fire.
Nonetheless, I think George missed a good networking opportunity. I’m young enough and yet experienced enough to know that George’s resume will someday find its way into my email inbox and, if history tends to repeat itself, he will call at just the right time to catch me here… “Yes, we have received your resume, George. ” Then I’ll have to pretend not to remember and say, “I think we might have spoken once before.. .hmmm… your name sounds so familiar… well, I really can’t remember… “
I think Andy Rooney said it best a few Sundays ago in his “60 Minutes” segment when he said, “Be careful; the toe you step on today, might be connected to the arse you have to kiss tomorrow. ” Classic! After the 9-11 terrorist attacks on the World Trade Center, times were very tough. Some folks say it was the worst job market since the Great Depression. Silicon Valley was especially hard hit. It seemed like everyone in Silicon Valley was calling me looking for a job
You’re reading an excerpt of a leading Executive Recruiter’s book, Work Your Network! By Joe Pelayo.
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